Full disclosure time – I owned an Alvin and the Chipmunks record. Titled “Chipmunk Punk,” it showcased the helium-tinged voices of Alvin, Simon and Theodore as they reworked the best of Billy Joel, Blondie and Queen. That’s not exactly punk, but I was 6 years old at the time and hardly knew better.
While my cultural tastes have matured a bit since then (at least, I like to believe), the Chipmunks’ act has digressed, reaching rock bottom in the form of an obnoxious feature film that sullies their good names. For reasons known only to him, Jason Lee plays Dave, a hapless songwriter who adopts the three singing chipmunks he finds in his kitchen. David Cross gets way too much face time as a greedy label executive. Cameron Richardson looks cute as Dave’s love interest. And you shouldn’t even be reading this far.
“Alvin” is too crude for kids – Simon actually eats Theodore’s poop in one scene – and too disjointed for teenagers. Hoping to cash in on the nostalgic audience that gobbled up “Garfield,” this film merely sells out. Perhaps the canisters containing the film can be collected and stored somewhere safe until winter. Nuclear winter, that is.
