But I digress. According to www.opensecrets.org, before the presidential field ever dwindled, the candidates collectively raised more than half a billion dollars in 2007. Some predict the eventual nominees will have to raise $500 million each to compete, a record sum in the presidential race. At press time, Hillary Clinton had raised more than $115 million, Barack Obama raised more than $102 million and John McCain raised more than $41 million.

That’s a disgusting amount of money.

After Super Tuesday, the media made much of which candidate was raising what sum. People were aghast that Clinton’s funds were so low she was forced to ride – gasp! – a press plane. The evening news was filled with battling budgets of who was raising more in a matter of days to continue their campaigns.

Obama raised $5.8 million online on Feb. 6. Clinton countered by loaning her campaign $5 million of her personal fortune, a sum that was quickly repaid. (By the by, can you imagine that? “Here’s $5 million to support me. But I’m only loaning it to you. So if you could repay me as quickly as possible that would be great. So get out there and get some money to support me. Thanks, guys!”) In January alone Clinton raised around $13 million, excluding her loan to, essentially, herself. Obama raised $32 million the same month.

Give it away now
I can’t help but imagine all the other things this money could be going to instead of funding plane flights, media spots and lodging. Imagine how impressive it would be if, instead of using all that money to fly to, say, Nebraska to campaign, one of the candidates instead said, “Hey, you know what. I’m not going to make it to Nebraska. Instead, I’m going to take the money I would have used in Nebraska and I’m going to donate $7 million to a key element of my platform.”

Give the $7 million to the Nebraska school system. Donate it to a drug rehabilitation program. Gift it to cancer research or a nonprofit health care system or … something. Anything!

I promise you’d win the vote more than throwing money away flying there and going door-to-door offering child care services so people can go and vote. And to be the first candidate to actually put some money where the supposed platform is? It would be astounding!

Now, I know there’s probably a fair amount of red tape. I’m clearly no political guru and I’m sure there would be some garbage about not using campaign funds for anything other than campaigning. But who better to battle the red tape than the politicians who create it? Plus, who is honestly going to say, “Absolutely not. You may not use my donated funds toward lung cancer research. I only want Obama to use them on mindless television advertising.” It wouldn’t happen.

Take it a step further and sacrifice a portion of your campaign in every single state and instead make donations in all of those local areas. Not only would it do a world of good and set a fabulous precedent, but it would undoubtedly bolster voter confidence that the candidate in question means business, that his or her campaign ideals aren’t mere smoke and mirrors.

Smart spending
It’s too much to hope that the political model that has existed since the days of Roman chariots would change. Money will always be a necessary evil to get anything accomplished. And it goes without saying that those who have the cash at the ready (or the backing of those who do) will continue to wield the power that goes along with it.

But let’s get smart about what we do with all that silver. Political campaigns are all about candidates advocating how they plan to change things, what they hope to accomplish, how they hope to make this country a better place to call home. What better way to do that than to start making a difference and campaign at the same time? Someone who takes altruistic action and hits the ground running will get my vote every time.

Kudos to close readers Adelaide Davis, Zelma Fink, Gene Fitzpatrick and Kelley Zorn who caught the spelling error in the “Be Mines” rant all about misspelling that ran in Charlotte Weekly’s Feb. 1-7 issue. Indeed, “don’t ice the cookie if you’re spelling isn’t all that solid.” (I told everyone to carefully watch for your/you’re usages!)

Special thanks goes to Fink and reader Gail Gretz who also sent along stories of their own icing mishaps. Fink’s co-worker Mike’s birthday cake came back reading “Happy Birthday Vanilla Icing” instead of “Happy Birthday Mike.” (Mike loved vanilla icing.) And when Gretz commissioned a cake for her husband’s college graduation to read “Congratulations … finally,” it came back with the instructions incorporated into the message: “Congratulations … finally (wants the word finally written smaller).” Nice.